Sunday, October 31, 2004

Harrah's Casino, the scariest place on Earth

This Halloween was the scariest Halloween I have ever had. Ever. I just got back home and still a little freaked out by it all. It started off as just your typical day but by night fall, it just got weird. Crazy weird. Okay, so I may be exaggerating just a tad bit but still... I guess you can be the judge.

My brother was in town this weekend on his way to Thailand (took a weekend layover in LA) so I drove up to LA yesterday, hung out with him and our family friend, Chai. That night, we drove back to San Diego, had dinner with Joe (who has been working until midnight this entire week), came back home watched TV and fell asleep. Normal, right?

Today was normal too. Drove my brother, Chai, and his girlfriend Paula around San Diego, had dimsum, went shopping. So we come home later and Chai suggests gambling. Whatever, I am not a big gambler at all but he had driven all the way down from LA and if he wanted to gamble, we will gamble (or well, I will watch them gamble). So we mapquest directions to a casino called Harrah's. It's about 25 miles NE of where I live. Mapquest said that it would take us 45 minutes but realistically, when you drive 25 miles it only takes you 20 minutes. We just thought that Mapquest was calculating the drive for slow people.

Anyways, it's about nightfall by this point, we had left the house and had already driven over 45 minutes. We still weren't there yet. It was the farthest away from civilization that I have ever gone since I moved to San Diego. There were no street lights, tiny TINY tiny street signs and STEEP ass edges of mountain that I had to drive up. There were moments when I stopped breathing while I was driving up the mountain because I really thought that I was going to die. I had images of me, my brother, Chai, Paula, and my little car falling off the cliff, plummeting to our fatal end. And the thing was, the farther up we drove, the more we realized how screwed over the American Indians are. Shit. I can barely drive up the mountain and these Indians had to walk up the mountain to make it to their new "home." Goodness. Andrew Jackson was the biggest jackass ever.

Anyways, it took us about an hour and few wrong turns but we finally made it. Mapquest should have warned us why they had calculated the "extra" time in. I can tell you why now-- it was because we had to drive up Mount Everest, that's why. I had to catch my breath again because I stopped breathing more than once while driving up that mountain. lol.

The casino itself was even scarier. Out in the middle of nowhere on top of this mountain was a HUGE ass casino filled with blinking lights promising gold and fortune if you played ______ (blackjack? craps? slots?). My first thought was-- Harrah's, the scariest place on earth. Then so many questions popped into my head as we entered... Why were there so many Asians? How did the Asians get up there? How long have they been there? Who has been playing the longest with no sleep? What's the appeal?

Suffice it to say, this is my first and last trip to Harrah's. ha ha ha. I made my brother drive back down because I was scared that I would start hyperventilating again. lol. I was feeling like the casino stole a bit of my soul but i'm okay now. I am whole again. hee hee.

Friday, October 29, 2004

I am so screwed

In order to start student teaching in February, I need to pass the CSET next Saturday. The CSET is a standardized exam given to newby teachers to test if they know their shit. It's given in three parts and you can choose to take one, two, or three parts of the exam in one day. When I was registering, I chose to take three. I mean, how hard could it be?

Because I did my research on the CSET after I registered for the exam, I learned that you need to be smart as hell to pass all three parts in the same day. I also learned that the few people that had passed all three parts in the same day had studied MONTHS beforehand. I just started studying on Monday. Obviously, my "I-can-pass-and-not-even-study" attitude towards the test has flown out the window. I am screwed! Screwed!!! SCREWED!!!! Hopefully two weeks of studying will be sufficient.

T-minus a week and a half until the CSET. Wish me luck.

Sunday, October 24, 2004

Crazy army soldiers

This is the tale of a young army man, as reported from Dek in South Korea:

When [Sergeant Martin] was a private and stationed at Fort Riley, Kansas, he got drunk in some bars one night during the winter. He was so sauced up that he couldn’t go home, so he broke into some old couple’s house to escape the cold and snow at about 3 in the morning. He felt so bad about this, he went upstairs to the old couple’s bedroom and said, “Don’t mind me pops…sorry about breaking in…I’m gonna rack out on your couch!” needless to say the gentleman called the police and when the cops showed up, they found SGT Martin making a sandwich in the kitchen! He replied, “what’s up dudes…’s ok…I told the old guy I was crashing here tonight!”

Monday, October 18, 2004

uhh, no we're just brother and sister

When did people start mistaking my brother and I for a couple? I don't know if it was just because we were in Tennessee or what, but many people complimented us by saying that we were a great-looking couple. Ick.

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Long Beach Aquarium

Just in case you can’t read the caption-- "Male sheephead are territorial; each protects a harem of females. When a male dies, the dominant female in the harem changes into a male..." You would think that the Aquarium would have a shock-alert next to these types of captions or at least a clause somewhere saying that some captions may cause possible heart-attack.

Imagine that?! One day, you're shopping with your little female Sheephead buddies for a new handbag; the next day, you're making sure that your same buddies (now known as bitches) don't slut around to any other female changing males. Hmm...

Maybe this post will teach you all who don't read captions in museums and aquariums to read them next time. You'll never know what you might learn from them...
Posted by Hello

Saturday, October 09, 2004

the ease of technology

"What's that?" I said, glancing over at my friend's itemized printout. A few rows were highlighted.

"It's my prayer and fasting schedule. I printed it out for the Ramadan. I got it off the web."

Friday, October 08, 2004

When bad things happen to unsuspecting people

"You like my new purse? It's called a Ho-bag."
"No mom, it's called a Hobo-bag."

A not-so-hop mom wanting to impress her two trendy daughters at dinner.

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

French Fries

"You like burnt fries! You always eat them first," exclaimed Joe when I gave him a dejected look after he threw his burnt fries onto my plate.

After I stopped laughing, I explained to him that I ate the burnt fries first because I liked them least. Gotta save the best for last.

Sunday, October 03, 2004

I should be doing homework

I found a little 411 on Sea Monkeys... For those of you interested in purchasing them as pets, here are a few discouraging sentiments. Mind you, this is directly quoted from a Sea Monkey owner off of

"1. SPILLS- I spilled water out of the two holes in the top by accident. BE AWARE. Walk slowly when they're in your hands.
2. FIGHTS- Sea Monkeys can sometimes fight over who gets the girl. Sometimes they fight over the death!! I haven't seen this happen yet, but I don't like the sound of it. I think they start to fight about... 4 weeks after they are born.
3. SEA DIAMONDS- Ah! I hate these Sea Diamonds. A few days ago I put some Sea Diamonds in the aquarium, thinking they would get excersise and have some fun. But I was wrong! First of all, the diamonds are huge. I think I crushed some Sea Monkeys when I added the diamonds in. Second of all, the Sea Monkeys are not interested in them at all...
4. AERATE- Some websites told me to mix more air in the aquarium. They told me to blow INTO A STRAW to give oxygen to them. I think I sucked some SM algae stuff down my throat..."

She neglected to add that she probably also swallowed Sea Monkeys during her aeration process.

Man, I really should be doing my homework.

Bed Bath and Beyond

I have never heard a greater sigh of relief followed by an appreciative chuckle until the day Joe explained to the sales clerk that it was our intention to buy the ugliest shower curtain they had in stock. Posted by Hello